ABOLUTES

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Absolutes

I have concluded that there are actually three things in life that are absolutes.

  1. 1.     Death
  2. 2.     Taxes
  3.  If you are a woman who is checked into the hospital through the emergency room, your legs will not have seen a razor for days. You may well be wearing clean underwear, per Mother’s instructions, but your legs will be as hairy as an Afghan hound…GUARNTEED.

 

The other truth that I discovered about the condition of the American Healthcare system is, no matter what is finally done with Obamacare, nothing can prepare you for hearing a masked surgery room nurse say,

“We are just going to clean and shave your groin with cold orange soap and then stick this wire up your……so we can get good pictures of your heart.”

In the fog and confusion of a heart attack moment, I clearly remember saying to the burly man in scrubs,

“Back Off Mr.  I divorced the last guy that tried that move on me.”

Thankfully, the surgery suite had an ample supply of “Night…Night” wonder drugs and my surgeon was not shy about using them.

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2 responses »

  1. Ha ha… that’s funny, and I have no doubt that it actually happened. Only you, Peanut. Hope everything is ok with your ticker.

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